That night Jacob got up and took his two wives, his two maidservants and his eleven sons and crossed the ford of the Jabbok. 23 After he had sent them across the stream, he sent over all his possessions. 24 So Jacob was left alone, and a man wrestled with him till daybreak. 25 When the man saw that he could not overpower him, he touched the socket of Jacob’s hip so that his hip was wrenched as he wrestled with the man. 26 Then the man said, “Let me go, for it is daybreak.” But Jacob replied, “I will not let you go unless you bless me.”27 The man asked him, “What is your name?” “Jacob,” he answered. 28 Then the man said, “Your name will no longer be Jacob, but Israel, e]”>[e] because you have struggled with God and with men and have overcome.”29 Jacob said, “Please tell me your name.”But he replied, “Why do you ask my name?” Then he blessed him there. 30 So Jacob called the place Peniel, f]”>[f] saying, “It is because I saw God face to face, and yet my life was spared.”



In the earlier post I just wrote, I alluded to an amazing adventure of building a poly family. It’s a post that I have been wanting to write for some time. The experience of writing, however, was colored by who I am today and what experiences are most at the forefront of my mind, namely, that we are experiencing some communication difficulties within the group, leading (I think) to jealousy in one member, though given the communication at the moment, I’m not entirely sure, and I’m learning to try not to assume the emotions of others.

With that said – earlier today I was writing to another member of the family that this could make me rethink the committment. And then I thought about it a lot and realized how foolish that could be, to encounter challenge – and flee. It’s reactionary, to say the least. It also is the antitheses of love as a decision.

As the day has worn on – my resolve to stay and to work through this has strengthened amazingly. Now more than ever, I am determined to do my part to make this work, to model healthy communication, to choose love – for myself and for truth, as well as for each person in this family, and in a very particular way, for the person whose emotions are in such turmoil.

Once upon a time I had nipple piercings. For a variety of reasons, mostly related to pregnancy and breastfeeding, I have taken them out.

I’ve been toying with the idea of having one or both put back. Today, as my resolve to choose love strengthened, the thought grew that I want something permanent in my skin that marks that resolve, reminding me of this struggle, and of the choice to which I will be faithful.

So getting the kids fed and changed (we played in the garden earlier, so dirtiness abounds).

And then off to the piercer.

Love and blessings,

Raven